Before Chemo and Radiation

Phone calls almost every day now . . . nurses, health technicians, nutrition specialist, social workers, insurance company advisors, counselors and so on. Dr. Wahl said the chemo drug selected for me (Cisplatin) may affect aspects of my central nervous system, specifically my hearing. So I will be having hearing tests regularly before and during the time I have chemo treatments. 

Nancy sent me a book –  “Middlesex” by Jeffrey Eugenides. It's about an intersex person. I read it in two days. Not that I have had such an experience as Mr. Eugenides, but I am accepting that I may very well have some degree of intersex syndrome. Some day I'll have my hormone levels evaluated to substantiate the possibility but for now I'll just keep clutching the mask of manliness despite my boobs and girly butt. 

. . .

I met with specialty nurse Bhark and Dr. Spiegel about radiation treatments and went to the radiology clinic to have a mask made for my face that will hold my head still during treatments. Also, Dr. Spiegel told me to see a dentist before radiation treatments. My old peridontal bones will be compromised by the radiation and the resulting damage could lead infection and festering bone sockets that take years to heal.  Apparently I can avoid that horror if I have the weaker teeth removed before radiation. 

. . .

Had my pre-chemo hearing test and my friend Bunk took me to my belly-tube appointment but while I was there I asked Dr. Rama why I was having the procedure done six or eight weeks before I would need tube feeding. He agreed that it seemed premature and let me leave unmolested. So Bunk and I went shopping at the Value Village thrift store. I got a really cute top.

. . . 

September 28 - Dr. Brown (Keano Reeves) removed six teeth from my lower jaw that he felt would not survive radiation treatments. I cried myself to sleep when I got home. 

Surgery

My best friend Nancy drove all the way from Wisconson to be with me and take care of stuff for me during my surgery time. She brought me to Seatlle Swedish Cancer Institute and stayed with me during and after the surgery. Dr. Golden performed the lymphadenectomy, bilateral tonsillectomy,  and excised some tissue from the base of my tongue. The operating room was about the size of a one-car garage – much smaller than I thought it would be. I also thought there would have been more people in the operating room. But it was just Dr. Golden, a nurse and the anesthesiologist. Dr. Golden said “Are you ready?” and before I could answer the bright overhead lights faded to blackness.  

I woke up in my hospital room five or so hours later with a six inch stitched up laceration in my neck and a drainage tube protruding from the right side of my throat. The drainage tube was filling a bag near my bed with blood. . . . nasty.  Even with the drain tube, during the first hour or so of being awake I threw up at least two pints of blood. If Nancy had not been there I probably would have whined a lot. But she was there, got to see me vomit blood and make jokes about it. I held on to my macho comedian mask as well as I could. Dr. Golden came in later to tell me that he found more infected tissue than expected and removed tonsils, a small piece from the back of my tongue, and eight lymph nodes instead of the anticipated six.  The gruesome result of the surgery left me unable to swallow without choking. I stayed in the hospital for almost a week recovering and learning how to swallow. It all seemed surreal. Like I was playing a part in an episode of Grey's Anatomy. 

Nancy brought me home and stayed with me for a few more days. I wish she could have stayed longer. Not because I need help. I just enjoy her company. Well more than that, I love her. . . something we don't talk about.